How Parents Can Recognize the Signs of a Struggling Young Adult?
Raising a child doesn’t end when they turn eighteen. For many parents, the hardest part actually begins when their young adult steps into independence. This stage, known as “emerging adulthood,” often looks exciting from the outside, but for many young people, it’s a time filled with uncertainty, pressure, and self-doubt.
According to the American Psychological Association, over 60% of young adults report feeling anxious or depressed, and nearly half say they struggle to manage stress in daily life. Many parents are caught off guard by how difficult this transition can be. They expect their child to thrive but instead see confusion, withdrawal, or emotional exhaustion.
At Bridge the Gap Services, we work closely with parents and young adults who are facing these exact challenges. We understand how easy it is for early warning signs to go unnoticed, especially when your child no longer lives at home. Recognizing those signs early can make all the difference, allowing families to step in with compassion and support before a small struggle becomes a full crisis.
Understanding Why So Many Young Adults Struggle
Today’s young adults are growing up in a different world the their parents did. The constant pressure to achieve, the influence of social media, and the uncertainty of the job market have created a generation that feels both overconnected and overwhelmed.
Many of them are also recovering from the social and emotional fallout of the pandemic years, when isolation and disrupted routines left lasting effects. Even now, some still struggle with confidence, social anxiety, and decision fatigue.
The truth is, this stage of life comes with a lot of “firsts,” first jobs, first apartments, first heartbreaks. Those new responsibilities can be exciting, but also terrifying. For some young adults, the stress becomes too much, and instead of moving forward, they begin to shut down.
Before diving into the specific warning signs, parents need to remember that these changes don’t always appear suddenly. They often unfold gradually, through small shifts in mood, behavior, and daily habits. Paying attention to those subtle patterns can reveal a great deal about how your child is really doing beneath the surface.
8 Signs of a Struggling Young Adult
1. Changes in Sleep or Energy Levels
One of the earliest and most common signs that a young adult is struggling is a noticeable change in sleep or energy. Maybe they’re sleeping through the day and staying up all night, or maybe they can’t seem to rest at all.
Sleep and emotional health are deeply connected. According to the CDC, adults who experience mental distress are twice as likely to report irregular sleep patterns compared to those with stable mental health.
Parents might notice their child frequently mentioning exhaustion, missing morning classes or work shifts, or using sleep as a form of escape. On the other hand, an overly restless pattern, constant late nights, anxiety-driven activity, or trouble winding down, can also signal deeper distress.
If you notice these changes, approach the topic gently. Ask how they’ve been sleeping or how their energy feels lately. Sometimes, a simple check-in opens the door for a deeper conversation.
2. Withdrawal and Isolation
It’s normal for young adults to crave independence, but consistent isolation is a red flag. Maybe your once-social child no longer spends time with friends or avoids returning calls and messages. They might skip family events or appear emotionally distant when they do show up.
This withdrawal can often stem from anxiety, depression, or feelings of shame about where they are in life. Many young adults compare themselves to their peers online and feel like they’re falling behind. That quiet self-doubt can lead to isolation, which in turn deepens loneliness.
As a coach, I often remind parents that isolation is a symptom, not defiance. Instead of taking it personally, see it as an invitation to reach out with empathy. A simple, “I’ve noticed you’ve been keeping to yourself more lately; are you doing okay?” can go a long way. Even if they don’t open up right away, your consistency tells them they’re not alone.
3. Changes in Routine, Hygiene, or Daily Functioning
Daily routines say a lot about a person’s mental state. If your young adult stops caring for themselves, skipping meals, avoiding showers, neglecting chores, it’s usually a sign that something deeper is happening.
You might notice their living space becoming cluttered, their bills or assignments piling up, or a general sense of chaos where there used to be order. Sometimes this looks like laziness from the outside, but it’s often a reflection of internal fatigue or hopelessness.
During home visits or video calls, pay attention to subtle details. Ask about their day, their meals, or how their schedule feels. These questions show interest without judgment and can gently lead into a conversation about how they’re coping.
4. Excessive Screen Time or Escapism
Technology isn’t the enemy, but it can become a distraction from pain. Many struggling young adults turn to gaming, endless scrolling, or streaming as a way to escape reality.
There’s a difference between healthy downtime and avoidance. If your child is spending entire nights gaming, skipping work to binge-watch shows, or constantly glued to their phone, it might be a sign that they’re overwhelmed.
Ask with curiosity rather than criticism. Try, “You’ve been spending a lot of time online lately; is that helping you relax, or does it make things harder sometimes?” Opening the conversation without judgment keeps communication open.
5. Shifts in Appetite and Physical Health
Mental and physical health are closely linked. Sudden weight loss, overeating, or a loss of appetite can all signal stress or depression. Energy changes often follow, feeling constantly tired, neglecting exercise, or losing motivation for daily movement.
Encourage your young adult to tune into how their body feels. You might say, “I’ve noticed you haven’t been eating much lately; is everything okay?” Sometimes, talking about physical habits feels safer for them than diving straight into emotional struggles.
Small changes, encouraging regular meals, gentle movement, or shared walks, can help restore balance and connection.
6. Emotional Outbursts or Unexplained Irritability
It’s common for struggling young adults to experience mood swings. You might notice more irritability, sudden tears, or emotional numbness. They may lash out one moment and retreat the next.
These emotional shifts can be signs of stress overload or untreated anxiety and depression. It’s not uncommon for young adults to mask their pain with anger or sarcasm because vulnerability feels too hard.
Instead of reacting defensively, pause and look beyond the surface. Respond with calm and empathy, not confrontation. Try, “It sounds like you’re really frustrated right now; want to talk about what’s been weighing on you?” Emotional safety is key to helping them open up.
7. Trouble Managing Responsibilities
Adulthood comes with bills, deadlines, and obligations that can easily overwhelm someone who isn’t emotionally ready. Missing rent payments, forgetting appointments, or frequently calling out of work can all be indicators that your child is struggling to cope.
Many young adults feel embarrassed to admit when they’re drowning under new responsibilities. They might hide the problem or avoid discussing it altogether.
If this sounds familiar, approach the topic gently. Offer to help them create structure, maybe by breaking down tasks together or setting small goals. The goal isn’t to take over, but to help them feel capable again.
8. Increased Substance Use
Sometimes, what starts as “blowing off steam” becomes a form of self-medication. If your young adult is drinking more, experimenting with substances, or using frequently to escape emotions, it’s a sign that they need more support.
According to the National Institute on Drug Abuse, young adults aged 18–25 have the highest rates of substance misuse in the U.S. This age group is particularly vulnerable because they’re still developing coping skills for stress and emotion regulation.
If you notice substance use becoming routine, stay calm and compassionate. Avoid harsh confrontation; instead, express care and concern. Let them know you’re there to support, not punish. Encourage professional help if needed, such as therapy, counseling, or sobriety coaching.
How Parents Can Help Without Pushing Too Hard
Recognizing the signs is only the first step. Knowing how to respond makes all the difference.
Here’s what we often tell parents at Bridge the Gap:
Start with curiosity, not control. Ask open-ended questions. “How have you been feeling about things lately?” can open a door that “What’s wrong with you?” will close.
Stay calm, even when it’s scary. Your reaction sets the tone. If they fear judgment, they’ll retreat.
Be present, not perfect. You don’t need all the answers; you just need to show up.
Offer options. Instead of giving orders, ask, “Would you be open to talking with someone?”
Model healthy coping. Let them see you managing stress, asking for help, and taking care of yourself too.
Sometimes, professional support can make all the difference. Life coaching, therapy, or mentoring can help your child build the tools and structure they need to move forward.
Rebuilding Hope as a Family
If your young adult is struggling, remember that it doesn’t mean you’ve failed as a parent. It means your child needs support, guidance, and time to grow, and that’s something you can absolutely help with.
At Bridge the Gap Services, we’ve walked beside countless families through these difficult transitions. We’ve seen young adults rediscover confidence, reconnect with their families, and rebuild their lives one small step at a time.
You don’t have to have all the answers, and neither do they. What matters most is staying connected, staying patient, and reminding them, every single day, that they’re not alone.